Kiddos at your wedding?
When you picture kids at your wedding, do you picture this…
(from bride.net)
(from Ken Cravillion)
Or this?
(from Hitched Studios)
(from Mark Adams Photography)
One of the most commonly asked questions we get when helping couples with their invitations is – how do I politely tell people that we don’t want kids at our wedding? Not an easy one for sure. On one hand you don’t want kiddos at the wedding, but then again you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings (and when it comes to kids and weddings, people seem to have a lot of feelings, or opinions for that matter). So what is a Bride and Groom to do?
Let’s see what Emily Post has to say…
- Do not print “no children” or “adults only” on an invitation. The way an invitation is addressed, whether on the inner or outer envelope, indicates exactly who is invited, and, by omission, who is not invited to the wedding. If the envelope is addressed to “Mr. and Mrs. Hayward,” then Mr. and Mrs. Hayward should not assume that their children are included. If the envelope is addressed to “The Hayward Family” or “Mr. and Mrs. Hayward, Sarah and Elliott Hayward” then it can be assumed that all mentioned are invited.
Here at The Wedding Cottage we do agree with Ms. Post. However, I am sure you are thinking that what Emily Post has to say is all well and good, but are guests even going to pay attention and notice that the kids weren’t on the invitation?
(from Premier Wedding Planners Scotland)
What we also suggest in addition to addressing your envelopes sans the kids is to speak to your parents and bridal party about your wishes to keep it an adult affair. Let them know that while you love the kids dearly, you feel the venue and occasion is best for adults. Your bridal party and family can then help to spread the word for you and answer any questions people might have.
When it comes down to it you should be able to decide whether or not you want kids at your wedding. However, just be realistic and know that if you are going to have a kids-free wedding, this will prohibit some of your guests from coming.
If you have other wording or etiquette questions stop by The Wedding Cottage – that’s what we are here for!